Wednesday, August 15, 2007

wishin' and hopin'

i have this dream of being a writer. i know that on some level i am a writer, at least my family thinks i am. but, i have this desire to be able to sit down and have the thoughts just pour out of me (which is probably the root behind this blog). the dream of writing something clever and witty, even deep, something that people will want to read. this desire is so strong in me that when i read something that catches my attention, or makes me laugh, i find myself thinking, "man, i wish i could write like that." this is the most recent of these moments. it is an excerpt written by kelly minter in the book "no other gods," where she describes standing in line at a quick copy store on a particularly frantic day.

"i parked and ran into the store only to find a line of about ten people with very interesting and complex printing needs. this triggered one of those irrational moments where you start having personal grievances against people who want things like pictures blown up to banner sizes. seriously, what do they need that for? i secretly mused. i found myself trying to supernaturally control the speed of the cashier, like if i thought hard enough and envisioned her moving just a little more efficiently, perhaps it would come true. i know this doesn't work, but i find it therapeutic anyway."

it's writing like this that makes me stop and say emphatically, "yes, i totally feel that. i've been there. this person is writing about my life." just yesterday i was standing in line at a grocery store wondering how it is that no matter what store, what time of day, or tilt of the earth's axis, i find myself in the longest line possible. there can be one person in front of me, but i guarantee that that one person has five items without price tags, or can't find their debit card, or wants to use cash for part of it, write a check for 1/3 of the remainder and give their first born child for the rest. and i, like kelly, find myself trying to will the cashier to move just a tiny bit faster, or for the shopper to miraculously become organized and move a little bit more efficiently. however, unlike kelly, i don't find this therapeutic at all. i think that this wishing and hoping only causes me to become a little bit more bitter with each second that i wait. and then i question why i'm even getting frustrated, because i'm in no real hurry. i don't have anywhere to be just then. and when i'm done pondering our society's need to have everything faster and quicker and how i SHOULD be different from this world's "gotta have it now" mentality, it's finally my turn to check out.